Overcoming Your Fear of Public Speaking with Ellie Burscough

 
 
00:00 / 00:27:04
 
1X

Ellie Burscough has coached hundreds of business owners to not only create 6 and 7 figure businesses, but to live life on their terms and create freedom and fun in their lives.

Ellie has worked with businesses in 12 different countries, in many industries including Personal Training, Gyms, Business Coaches, Life Coaches, Acting Academy, E-Commerce, Online Coaching and Music Schools to name a few.

She has presented at Virgin Active in Singapore and Snap Fitness in Australia. She has also spoken to over 100 Year 9 students on self-esteem and body image and spoken at multiple Business Events, groups and Retreats on business growth, wellness and mindset.

From CEO’s of large companies to Year 9 school students, all have been inspired by Ellie’s simple steps and “Freedom Lifestyle” Philosophy.

Ellie loves inspiring and motivating others to create a life they love, whilst growing their business and transforming lives.

She has created her own business that allows her to travel the world with her family, give to people and charities in need and do what she loves every day.

Get in touch with Ellie Burscough:

Victor Ahipene: Speaking nation, what’s happening. Welcome to another episode of public speaking secrets. I’m your host Victor Ahipene, super pumped to have you here because we are going to go through some things that I think holds a lot of us back, not just in public speaking but in a lot of different areas of our life. But in particular, I think it’s the reason that a lot of you out there maybe avoiding getting out there, speaking or chasing those bigger events. And it is of course fear. I know Seinfeld said that, uh, you know, 80% of people fear, fear, public speaking and so they’d rather be in the casket than giving the eulogy at the talk, which is a, hopefully not where you are if you’re listening to this or hopefully won’t be where you are once we finish with our session today with Ellie Burscough who is, uh, one of my friends, she’s always around the world, but I don’t know if Brisbane is sometimes still home, but welcome to the show Ellie.

 

Ellie Burscough: Yeah, thanks for having me.

 

Victor Ahipene: So, yeah, Ellie is an awesome and highly successful business and mindset coach and she helps people, uh, you know, scale up from wherever they are to six and seven figure businesses by overcoming a lot of the barriers that potentially hold them back with a lot of different techniques. One of them being a Neuro Linguistic Programming and working on a lot of the internal things rather than just having a structure to give a speech to overcome fear. But because we all all know that yes, that can be effective and yes, that’s something I help a lot of people with us giving effect of presentations. But if we’ve got too much anxiety, too much stress, too many things holding us back from even putting our foot forward, then uh, it’s a, you know, it’s going to be a barrier for a lot of our success and a lot of our, our thing. So I’m excited to jump into that Ellie. Can you give everyone a bit of a bit of background about, I guess why? First off, they should be listening to you in regards to this because you know it’s, it’s a thing a lot of people don’t want to necessarily confront when it comes to it. And kind of your journey to where you are to where you are now.

 

Ellie Burscough: Yeah, sure. So I’ve been in business for eight years now and I started out as a personal trainer, rent running mom’s boot camps. I then transitioned into business is this coaching because I saw a lot of people out there struggling to make money working crazy hours but not really making much. And I created an amazing community and business with my first business power moms and wanted to help other people because of the success I’d had. So I started off with kind of like coaching and then I added the NLP Neuro Linguistic Programming too. I guess my tool, well and then I’ve studied spiral as well, which is from spiral dynamics and the shocker system. And so basically with the NLP stuff, it’s very heady. It’s very much around changing your perspective and your perception of things that have happened in the past and also things from the future and whereas adding the spiral to it as well, it’s about releasing it emotionally, feeling it and releasing it from your body. So it’s super powerful putting those two things together. Plus coaching plus you know the strategy as well as the mindset work because that’s what gets people really fast results with what I do.

 

Victor Ahipene: Yeah. Awesome. And I mean that’s one of the big things I’ve gone through some different in our p things at different times and I think what some of the best presenters out there and some of also the probably the worst in using NLP techniques and their presentations. And I say that just because it is so powerful. Like, you know. Yeah. Exactly. It’s, yeah, it’s you, you’re the superhero and you can decide to be if you want it, you know, you want to be in it or you want to be in that, and the bad guys. And I mean that’s the thing that in our P’s, great for a personal side of things. And a lot of the, once you understand that even at a, like at a rudimentary level like I do, you can see the different strategies in the different reasoning that people were using it throughout their presentations. And I talk a lot about controlling the narrative when you’re giving a talk, like you want to be controlling that narrative and keeping people guessing so they stay engaged and a lot of those, a lot of those in our RP, open loops and closed loops and um, you know, different strategies to keep people engaged. If you use it very deliberately, you’re going to be memorable, you’re going to make an actual change with your message versus just being out there regurgitating that side of things when it comes. Because I know you’ve helped a lot of people would be a speaking as well as the mindset and their, their stuff towards that. What do you like, how would you explain fear when it comes to public speaking or just in general? Like what is on a deeper level? What is fear?

 

Ellie Burscough: Yes. So fear, we do have some fear from the past, but a lot of fear is like future paced worry, fear, anxiety, overwhelm, stress that all future emotions. And what that means is we’re thinking about something that hasn’t even happened yet. Something in the future and usually thinking about it in the worst case possible scenario in a negative sense. So with speaking for example, you’re thinking about a speaking presentation that you are about to do or that you want to do, maybe you haven’t even booked in yet and you’re holding yourself back from doing it from fear because you’re thinking, oh well what if no one likes it? Or what if I forget what I’m saying? Or what if I’m boring or what if I don’t make any sales? If you’re selling from stage and you’re thinking about all these negative things, so what I help people to do is release the fear from the past. So usually from the past it’s from when was zero to seven years old, which is the imprinting phase and that it can be from other times, well, but most of our beliefs are formed in, in that age bracket. And we would go back using the thing called timeline therapy. And you change your perspective on the thing that scared you in the past, why you’re holding onto that fear in your body. Now with the future paced worry, we can do things like an anxiety exercise where you’d go out and 15 minutes after the successful completion of the event. So you actually visualize yourself after you’ve done your presentation. Everyone’s clapping and smiling and you know you did an amazing job and you’re so proud of yourself and you’re getting all of those emotions up, the pride, the sense of achievement, the happiness, and you’re noticing what you can see what you can here and you make those colors brighter. The sounds louder and really paint this picture. And when I’m doing it, I’m talking quite fast and like using my voice right now because when I would take someone through that, I want to sound confident, I want to put that in them through my voice. And um, and that’s what it’s really about. It’s changing from thinking about the negative to thinking about the positive. And when we do that over and over and over again, it’s creating a different pattern in our brains so then we can go out there and be present and be able to deliver from that presence where all the, from that worrying about the future and the feel.

 

Victor Ahipene: That’s what I love because I haven’t got the same grounding in it. But it’s, yeah, a lot of the time if you can, uh, you know, when they say anxiety is fear of the future depressions, fear of the past and um, you know, looking at what is your worst case scenario. Like a lot of people were like, Ah, if I forget to say something, you’re like, well it matter. Yeah. Well, well, if you forget to say something that nobody knows is going to come up in your presentation, is it going to, is it going to, oh, what if people Boo me, how many, and then I go through people and I’m like, how many times have you been in an audience? It’s not a standup comedian or someone on Australian idol or something who’s horrible that actually people will just grab your phone out and just switch off. They’re not going to go to the issue of Booing you. But yeah, and I spoke at a podcast conference a couple of years ago. We had a time when we were, we had like a um, a few of us on stage and we had this conversation about, and it’s the same with speaking, people worry about say podcast download numbers so much and they’re like, oh, I’ve only got 50, a hundred, a thousand, whatever it, yeah, it took it all back to it. But what if you have one person and you massively impact that one person or if you have 30 listeners to an episode, if you had 30 people in a room, how much would you put in to putting out some awesome content to have an awesome impact? Even if you speak? Yeah. If you future pace and you go, look, there’s going to be an audience of a hundred people, I might only impact 50 of them positively in host people go out and impact, say their businesses and there’s 50 businesses with employees and blah blah blah. And it’s like once once she can, you know, future pace and flip that switch and go shit, it’s like it’s 50 people, that’s 250 business owners or that’s you know, 500 staff members and it’s like, well, yeah, yeah. And so whith people doing say if, if someone was to do what you’ve just said with the, you know, the, the say the future pacing activity to prepare themselves mentally to speak or to take those opportunities. Is that like a, do it once a week, do it once a day, do it 10 times a day and you know, for how long kind of thing or how, how would they go about it to kind of make it a routine of some sort that they can, you know, make sure they get some sort of result of.

 

Ellie Burscough: yeah. Well, you could do it once when you’re, when the fear actually comes up when you realize. So you are scared of that thing. So I’ve had people use it for, they’ve never driven a car before. It’s just like the driving or getting on a plane or public speaking or getting on sales calls. You can use it for so many different things. So when it comes up, you can do it then so that you’re not feeling that fear as you’re going through the process leading up to it. But then if you’re feeling a bit of those butterflies or nervousness or whatever in, say the week leading up to it, you could literally do it every night before bed. So it’s not something that you have to do a certain number of times to, you might do it once and feel fine, but if you notice that nervousness or that fear coming up again, you can use it again. And it’s something that literally takes a few minutes. Um, you could even do it as, as you’re about to step out on stage, you know, and there’s a few other things you can do to get in state before speaking as well. And you know, Tony Robbins uses these a lot to like pump himself up and things like that. So there’s a couple of things you can do. One of them is anchoring and that’s where you can anchor, say something on your physical body. So you can think about a time when you felt really, really confident. And then once your facial expressions changing, you can press on like your knuckle for example, until that facial expression goes back to neutral. And then you lift your finger up and then anytime you put your finger there, you’re going to go straight to that confident phase cause you’ve anchored it in with the top.

Um, you can do that as well with like, you know, maybe putting your fingers together because maybe you don’t want to put your hand up and put your finger on your not feeling profound, in audience. And when you are on stage, if you’re feeling like you’re losing your confidence do you could just press your fingers together and go get that rush of confidence back. Um, all the ones the way you like it, I’m visualizing the room before you go in there and you’re really get dropping into your body, dropping into presence and dropping into the purpose of why you want to do this. So a lot of anxiety and fear comes from thinking about ourselves and when we get out of our own head and stop worrying about all the things about us and we think about our mission, our purpose, our why, who were doing this for, then you really, you let go of the thing of like, oh I’m going to be rejected or I’m going to be booed or I’m going to be whatever because you realize it. Like he just said before, you’re doing it for that one person or however many people. And you, when you said that, it made me think of, I’ve had people that have told me through working with me, they didn’t kill themselves, they didn’t commit suicide. It’s like I’ve actually site people’s lives through them signing up with me and the work that they’d done with me and me just believing in them and like if I can do that for one person, like all my work is worth it. You know?

 

Victor Ahipene: It’s a thing that we often forget and get lost then and you know we’re worried about how can I reach a hundred people, how can I reach a thousand people? And it’s like, how can you, yeah, what do you want to achieve? Like you want to make, I know I like, I know you, I know you want to make, genuinely want to make people’s lives better. If that means a person being alive, it’s, yeah, you’re like sweet, game over. Even if I don’t get any clients again, like if I, if I don’t impact anybody else, keep somebody alive and you know, again that flow on that, that ripple effect, it’s like it has an effect of their families or your hair’s in a positive way and things like that. So that’s a good call. And I love the getting into the state side of things because I’ve been to some of, uh, one of a Tony Robbins events and you obviously you work pretty much for four days on getting yourself into a peak state. Um, yeah, the, the, yeah, for any Tony, Tony Robbins people out there, it’s how fast can you do it. Click of your fingers. You can change your state. And what I think is super important for many of you out there, if you hold going, like figure out what you can do to get yourself in a state during a presentation like I, this isn’t something I necessarily have taught. I’m going to now, um, from, from there, find something that can get you into a peak during your presentation because I energy’s contagious. But if you have seen people try and sell or pitch something from stage, this is massive awkward energy that so many people who aren’t confident in what they’re about to sell or a scared to ask for the sale. They give this really compelling 45 minute presentation. And then I’ve got this 15, 20 minute pitch coming up and they’re like, and so I’d to just offer you this and if you’re interested in doing this, then um, yeah, just if you feel like doing it, just maybe fill out your name and yeah. Yeah. And it’s just this, you can feel the energy shift in the room, whereas dates where you should be going, why am I here? I’m here to serve people. I’m here to serve them further. I need to be in a fricking peak state. And it doesn’t mean being a Rah Rah Rah. Yeah. They say American Americanized Speaker that comes out pumping their fists. It’s, it’s being authentically you with a bit of energy on the stage because that’s.

 

Ellie Burscough: it could be energy. It could even be a really super chill place. Maybe someone is very softly spoken and very chill and calm and maybe they’re putting that energy across, but it’s like dropping into whatever is um, you know, congruent with your own kind of personality type. And I think with what you just mentioned about the pitch as well, it’s like a lot of people see a tool, like a presentation as, okay, I’m going to talk and give some value. Oh and now I’m going to go into the sale. Like it’s two separate things. And it’s like when you flow between the two and you’re just present and you’re there. It’s like I have, I have a structure when I speak, but I also allow myself to go off on tangents or whatever pops into my head. And that’s where I find the gold is. And I see it as one, my whole presentation is one big thing. It’s not, hi, I’m going to talk and then I’m going to sell you. It’s like I’m putting in stories that will help lead to the sale throughout it. Anyway, stories from myself and results I’ve gotten and I just do that quite naturally. But if someone’s maybe starting out, they could kind of have a bit of structure, more structure to that, but it’s not one thing and the other, it all flows and that can really build the confidence as well.

 

Victor Ahipene: Yeah. And I think part of it is as, yeah, like you say, having a degree of structure, but knowing that if you have structured it correctly in what you’re delivering, showing results, overcoming different objections, like there’s basically a sales presentation. This is how many objections can you overcome prior, authentically and genuinely and like, hey, you can do this. You know, you don’t need to be a millionaire. Hey, you can do this. Even if you haven’t got a product, even if you’re a solo preneur, whatever you overcoming those objections. So like you say, it just naturally flows because you’re like, okay, cool. I’ve overcome every reason for you not to sign up with me or move further his, his, this opportunity to actually implement it or do it or work with me further or whatever it may be. Um, and I think, you know, obviously there’s a, a degree of NLP in that as well with that. But I think with people being able to, yeah, I loved that, that, uh, you know, picturing yourself 15 minutes afterwards, I gave a Tedx talk and it’s exactly what I did. I was made to stay with my sister the night before. Um, and I was like, no, it’s going to be a crappy bid. I’m going to go get a hotel room. I’m going to, I had a bath like just because it had one that could fit me because most bands don’t accommodate six foot three guys and he had a bath. I close my eyes. You know what it was going to feel like being on stage, how much I’d wanted to be on that stage, how it would feel, talking to people, the impact when it got online and all of those things. And I was like relatively super chilled. Like we talked earlier, like you’re still gonna have butterflies. It’s not getting rid of nerves. It’s getting rid of fear. It’s, it’s, yeah, I want nerves. I want nerves before I play sports, I want nerves before I go. Cause I know that all that’s got my nervous system peaking to put out an awesome performance.

 

Ellie Burscough: It’s not a big enough thing you’re doing. It’s just like, oh this is easy. It wouldn’t be natural. And I really love the book, the big leap by Gay Hendricks. He says, fear is excitement without the breath. So it’s like, you know, when we get scared or anxious with shallow breathing or holding our breath and it’s just like, just breathe. And when, when you breathe the fear and the excitement of the same thing, so that nervous energy, it’s really excitement. And so when you can look at something instead of with fear, with like curiosity and with excitement, then you’re going to have a better, you know, uh, better. Um, also what experience and confidence builds with action. So whenever you’re doing something new for the first time or you know, you’re quite new to it, there’s going to be, you’d be there and that’s okay. And it’s normal. And so just knowing that it’s normal and having the awareness around that is one thing. And then knowing that if you’ve done that over and over and over again, it will become natural and you will build your confidence.So the flip side of that is that if we have all these goals, like say someone’s never spoken before, they want to do a ted talk or something like that and they’re just thinking about it, it’s like, oh, I’ll do that one day and the more that we think about something and don’t actually do it, then the more that fear and that anxiety and that overwhelm builds until it becomes so big in your head that it’s like you just physically feel like you can’t do it and it’s like just take the first step so that you can build that self-belief and that confidence and that’s when the fear and anxiety will go away.

 

Victor Ahipene: Yeah. I love that. I want to just happen to one last thing that you, you spoke about is that zero to seven years old. We’re a lot of our past fears and things are developed. What are some ways that people can, can look into that or start, start addressing some of those things and how might they manifest? Like I know, I know I’m probably opening a 12 hour conversation just to give people a bit of an insight. Maybe on how they manifest and how they might want to start approaching to find out what exactly those things.

 

Ellie Burscough: Yeah, the best way to do it is with the, with the coach obviously because sometimes we can’t see the things that are going on in our lives that someone else with an outside perspective could see. So the way that I do it with my clients is using timeline therapy. Um, and we basically go back to an event that pops up for them using this method and we go back to that and you take a perspective where you’re looking down on the event and you find the positive lessons and learnings from the event to be able to change the perspective. So that’s just part of that process. Now, if someone doesn’t have a mentor or they maybe can’t afford it right now for whatever reason, and they want to start working on this stuff, I actually wrote it out recently, a whole big long list of all my shit that I want to clear. And it’s things like, you know, if I find that I’m judging someone or that if I’m scared of something or whatever’s going on. Yeah. And I wrote this big long list of things that I can clear myself. And if someone doesn’t have those tools, just writing it down and having the awareness around it is super powerful. And journaling on it and realizing, you know, where’s that coming from? What maybe happened in my past to to bring that up. Um, usually a lot of fear can come up when we’re about to step out of our comfort zone and about to step up in a big way. So knowing that that’s normal and, and looking deeper into asking questions of yourself, okay, this is the thing that’s coming up. This is what triggered it. Why is this showing up? Where did that come from? What emotion showed up and what are the belief systems around it and what can I do moving forward? What positive beliefs do I want to put there instead? And what action can I take to be able to move forwards from this? So that’s just a simple kind of journaling exercise that anyone could do really. But if they still stuck on that and can’t figure it out themselves and definitely look at getting a coach or someone to help them through that.

 

Victor Ahipene: I think, I think it gives Facebook an idea on the, on the depth of the psychology of different things. I was like, yes, why am I binge eating? Why am I fearful of doing this? Why am I, borrowing money or whatever. And maybe maybe this is just me just verbalizing all these things that I need to journal, but I’m one of the, it’s those sorts of things that it’s not like, oh you need to start eating healthier, obviously. You know, potentially you do, but it’s, well what are these triggers? What it like, you know, getting this deeper understanding. And I think making yourself aware of them for status and then it getting someone to help you. Cause, I mean Tony Robbins a enough he sit at or I’ve just heard it from him. But the fastest way to get from where you are to where you want to be is find someone who’s already dredged through all of that crap and bottle was going. And I, I mean I, I, I know you, I know a lot of your backstory and I know it hasn’t been this silver spoon, easy road, uh, rise to the top. Um, but it’s taken a lot of work personally and learning from others and then finding your own systems and stuff like that. So I’d highly recommend people if they do want to get past at journaling stage and just fast track, fast track, getting rid of the crap basically and tight things to another level, then reach out to Ellie. But if people want to find you, we’ll link it [email protected] but it’s, they want to find you right this minute while they’re listening. We can they go and what can they do?

 

Ellie Burscough: Yeah. So it’s just Ellie Burscough, that’s me on my personal page on Facebook, my business page and my Instagram. I also have a free group on Facebook called Seven Figure Mindset for Entrepreneurs. But yeah, if anyone wants to friend me up or follow me, they can do that. And just, if you’re going to friend me up, shoot me a personal message and say where you came from as well.

 

Victor Ahipene: Cool. Well, we’ll link all of [email protected] if you’re traveling, walking around and haven’t got somewhere to write it down. And uh, I, yeah, as always, appreciate our chats and look forward to getting out to a lot of people. And you know, these, these are the secrets that a lot of speakers have already had to work through to overcome their own fears and their own blocks in and both business and speaking. And it’s these things that are going to hopefully help take all of you to a whole other level with your speaking. So I appreciate your time, Ellie.

 

Ellie Burscough: Yeah. Thank you.

 

Victor Ahipene: Look forward to catching up somewhere in the world somewhere in time soon.

 

Ellie Burscough: Yeah. Awesome.